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The Road to Take

Written by Raymond Santos Estrella on Saturday, 13 May 2000. Posted in 2000

Looking at my the date stamp on my previous entry, it has been ages since I last wrote anything in here and I’ve got a lot to tell you about so you can catch up on my life.

Well, I first of all, I’m taking up advanced summer classes so that I’ll be all ready to compensate for my shifting or my plans of taking up a double major. I’m taking up FIL 14 and CHN 1 right now and they I’m doing pretty okay in both. I’m not excelling, that much is apparent but I’m not failing either.

Like before, my Filipino class has become a playground of different literary theories: Marxism, Psychoanalytic theory, Postmodernism, Post-colonialism and a lot of other -isms that have made my previous classes both intellectually stimulating and mentally draining. We’re on postmodernism right now and I’m enjoying it quite well because this is what really sparked my interest in all this stuff back in the first semester of my Freshman year here in the Ateneo. The concept of binary opposites, deconstruction, epistemic violence and a host of other stuff are back. All I can say is that I’m enjoying myself a lot.

I thought that taking up Mandarin Chinese for my foreign language subject was going to be a disaster, seeing as I have no background in it nor do any of my immediate relative but I was proved wrong. It isn’t the easiest of subjects nor is it the hardest. I don’t know how to describe it because my feelings for it change every meeting. Sometimes I hate it, sometimes I enjoy taking it up. But more or less I’ve come to accept it and if given the chance, would like to study chinese in more depth. I mean, it can prove useful when it comes to conducting business with chinese businessmen or even just buying stuff from Greenhills to haggling for a new shirt in Hong Kong. Who knows?

I just finished the movie Il Postino which in English translates to “The Postman.” It’s about the Chilean poet Pablo Neruda’s relationship with his private postman, Mario Rousseau. It tells the tale of how much Mario looks up to Neruda, on how he desires to be a poet and becomes friends with Neruda. The dialogue is sparse but witty and they seem to say the right things at the right moments. The background Italian music carries the story quite well and the breathtaking backdrops like a cliff overlooking the rolling blue waves can make your heart ache for more. The fact that the character of Neruda plays a supporting role is what makes this film even better because you’d think that the importance would be given to the Nobel prize-winning poet but no, it follows the life of Mario. The film is visually exotic and the content is heart-wrenching.


Last Monday, I was passing by Kostka Hall and I looked at the bulletin board in front of the Office of Admission and Aid and I didn’t know if I was going to jump for joy or hit my head on a wall. There it was: the list of accepted transferees to the Ateneo. I looked down the list and sure enough, her name was there. Yup, Roni passed! I’m smiling that foolish grin I’ve been smiling every time I wrote about her back in my senior year in high school. My God, it’s been so long since I last saw her and looked in her eyes. It’s been so long since I had any worthwhile conversation with her. Man, I miss her so much.

I know that I’ve been waiting for this news ever since I learned that Roni had plans to transfer to Ateneo but I’m still reluctant to accept it. More questions have popped up since the results sunk-in. This news has the potential to change a lot of things and could make a huge impact on the way my life runs. I mean, what happens now that she’ll be in school everyday? I might pass her by in the corridors and what do I do then? How will I be conducting myself in Roni’s presence?

What exactly does one do when a girl they’ve loved for so long and so deeply suddenly comes back into their life?

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About the Author

Raymond

Raymond Santos Estrella

I guess I should really make a proper writeup here. Something witty or maybe a joke to add some levity. I’ll come back to this when I have time. If you have any suggested copy that I can insert here, drop me a line.

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